Update. It's finally time again for my once-a-year entry. Woohoo!!! Actually, not much has happened except that we've won the lottery, retired, moved out of Chicago to a tiny resort in Maui and had our 5th child......... Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, the good life!!!!!!!! Wake up, Mike! Okay, back to the reality. The only truth to that is that we've moved. We recently closed on our condo after three years of living there. It was a sad time thinking back of all of the memories from that place - our first place together in Chicago, Ethan's first place, hosting our first NCCC small group, the good times, the bad times, the endless nights of partying... We loved the location so much that we moved a block away, temporarily for about 7 months (our next place is currently under construction in Lincoln Park). Closing. Closing on our place this past Wednesday should have been a care-free, exciting, joyful process lasting about an hour. Yeah, right. Actually, the deal almost fell through. Here's how the situation played out. Around 10:00 a.m., I show up at the title company and greet the buyer. Of course, the agents and her attorney are running late. Me: So, do you have any final questions about our place before you move in? Buyer: Hmmmmmmmm. Oh yeah, what is the number of the storage space that comes with the condo? Me (realizing our place doesn't come with storage space and thinking why did you have to open your big mouth and be nice): Our place doesn't come with storage space. Who told you that? Buyer: Your agent. She walked me down to the storage area and told me that one of the spaces would be mine after closing. Me (yikes!!!!!!): I'm sorry, but she must have been mistaken because I never said that we had storage space. The next part is abridged and paraphrased for dramatic effect. Buyer (starting to turn red): Huh?!? What are you *&!%$%!$*((*&(!)()&%!% talking about? Are you guys %(*!&%%!#$^!& serious? If I don't get a storage space, I'm !!#%%*&^!%^&%((()&&^%&^%&^) walking out of here. Me (grabbing the table and throwing it out of the way): No you *&^^&$^%&%*(*)(!*^^&!$&^ won't! I command you to sign the )*^&**(!*^%%^$(*&!@ closing documents!!! - Actually, I grabbed my attorney and we starting scrambling to see of the purchase agreement mentioned storage space. It didn't. Whew!!! We find out later that the MLS listing didn't mention it either. It's not my side's fault. In come our agents and her attorney. Me (grabbing my agent by the shirt and lifting her up to see me face to face): What did you &!$*^!^%^!%*&(!& tell her? I want to know now!!!! My agent (to me and my attorney for about 25 minutes): She's ^%&%*(*)(!*^^&!$ lying........................!!!! Buyer (after finding out what my agent said for about 10 minutes): You're ^%&%*(*)(!*^^&!$ lying..................!!!! Her agent (ditto for about 10 minutes): Your agent is ^%&%*(*)(!*^^&!$ lying..................!!!! Me (with tears streaming down my eyes): Can everyone stop acting like savaged beasts and behave with at least a modicum of decorum! Finally, my agent and her agent go off to another room to duke it out with each other for about an hour!!!! I'm sitting with my attorney preparing to file a lawsuit against the buyer for specific performance (legalese for forcing the buyer to follow through on the contract). Bloodied, broken and weary, the agents finally return. Each agent will donate a kidney to the buyer's favorite organ donation organization. I reserve the right to their livers. Actually, after about 2.5 hours, the situation gets resolved. Each agent offers a portion of their commission to give the buyer a credit to eventually buy a storage space. Still fuming, the buyer signs the documents. The closing is finally complete!!! Even though it was the buyer's agent's fault, my agent helped him out because they both work for the same broker, and she wanted to make sure the buyer signed the closing documents. Moral of the story if you're a home buyer - Verify that everything you expect to come with the place (e.g. appliances, storage, parking, fixtures, etc....) is listed in the purchase agreement before you sign it. Your agent should be responsible for this, but sometimes they drop the ball as in this case. Moral of the story if you're the home seller - Never, ever, ever ask if there are any final questions that the buyer has, especially at closing!!! Now, off to Vegas in about a month to win me enough cash so that I can retire!!!! | 
